Funny how initiating serious publication research sparks writer’s block.
It’s actually not funny. It’s annoying.
But it’s understandable—stress and all that. The feelings of overwhelmedness arising from all the things I need—or want—to accomplish in the three weeks of near complete freedom of Christmas break. Things pertaining to publication for my first novel, writing the second, preparing myself professionally–both in general and for my artistic career–and preparing my portfolio, resume, and statement of intent for application to art school.
But what is good enough? Or not just good enough–exceptional. How can I find exceptional in three weeks?
Don’t get me wrong, I’m really excited. This is an awesome season to be in.
Still, I feel like I’m wasting a lot of time, freezing up, sleeping in too late, succumbing to lack of motivation. And I’m supposed to be resting, aren’t I? This is Christmas break. I’m going to be graduating in four months.
But how can I rest? How can I not use these open-ended days to get ahead and make life easier for myself when I have considerably less time at my disposal?
And then there’s Christmas. Figuring out presents for X number of people has often been a daunting prospect for me. I would love to make everything by hand, or have it all deep and meaningful and show that I care like I want to.
I’m finding the counterproductive nature of having too much time. There’s none of the structured pockets of time that usually keeps me in line.
I’m putting along though, whittling away at things, staying on top of writer’s block by writing whatever scenes or concepts or conversations come to mind regarding the novel in progress. It seems to be helping.
But there’s definitely a more restful way I could be going about this.
Still trying to figure that out.
So I made myself dinner tonight. I think that’s a start.